I've been working on this blog for a few days, writing posts that will automatically post in the coming days and registering my blog on free search engines. However, I haven't shared it with any of my friends or family.
I'm afraid that if I let them read my posts that they'll think I'm being hypocritical, or that they will think that I'm not doing as well as I think I am. I'm afraid of their criticism, afraid of disappointing them. What if they think I'm a fraud?
I've never been very open about my depression before. When people ask how I'm doing, I'll respond "I'm ok," or "I'm fine." Nobody really wants to know how I'm doing. Or, if they do, I don't want to tell them because there's really nothing that they can do to help.
But, my family and friends are my support system, so I probably should share my blog with them. Even though their advice or criticisms might be a hard pill to swallow, I need to be challenged right now. I need to know the things that I can't see in myself.
I know for sure that my mom will read my posts. She's always been there for me, in the front row, cheering me on. I already mentioned to her that I was working on a blog, so I think she'll be the first one I'll tell. Then, maybe I can start opening up to more people after that.