Tuesday, May 3, 2011


I haven't felt much like writing lately. I don't think it has been because I didn't want to, but because I'm not really sure what to talk about right now.

I've been keeping busy. Work is going well and I have some volunteer opportunities coming up to interpret concerts and festivals. I was asked to do them by a client who likes my work, so that makes me feel really good. I haven't seen her in about a year, but it's nice to know she still thinks about me and likes what I do.

The puppy has been an experience. She's still getting house broken, which is getting better and better. She knows that outside is for going potty, but she still hasn't learned that inside is NOT for going potty. She's not as crazy as I thought a puppy would be. She does have her spurts of energy, but she also likes to take it easy. Cuddling with her always makes me feel good, no matter what is going on. She has had to go to the vet a few times, though, because she's got a lump on her head, which we think is from her clumsiness and her propensity for bonking her head on things (she doesn't know how big she really is!)

Grandpa got out of the hospital today. I didn't get to visit him as much as I wanted to. Some evenings I got out of work late (and he goes to sleep early) and other evenings I had commitments to keep, like taking care of the animals, going to the vet, bridal shower, etc, etc. He goes home today, but I still won't be able to get there at a decent time before he starts getting settled in for the night. I feel guilty, even though he knows I've been calling and asking about him, having my mom pass along my apologies for not being able to be there.

I've been making some efforts at home to get some projects going. I stopped by Lowes and got their credit card so I can redo my floors. The guy came out and took measurements last night. This weekend I'll pick out the materials and pay for them to install them. Then, in 2-3 weeks I'll have all the pet-stained carpets ripped up and nice new laminate flooring in it's place!

I saw my therapist for the last time two Saturdays ago. I didn't tell her outright that I was planning on finding another therapist. I just told her that I didn't have my work schedule yet. (Just a small fib.) I played phone tag for a while with one therapist, who doesn't seem to be able to do evening/weekend appointments, but I did just schedule with a new therapist who has an opening for me every other Tuesday night. I can't see her until the 17th, but at least I've got someone else to try!

In the meantime, I'm going to try going to a few Al-anon meetings. Growing up with an alcoholic father is sure to have messed me up a bit. I'm not sure what to expect of the meetings, but I'll try it out. Maybe I'll relate a lot with the other people there. Maybe I'll discover certain things about why I am who I am.

On a final note, I think that no matter what medications I'm on, I'm screwed once a month. Even though I've been feeling pretty good, when I get hormonal, I get bitchy. The other day I was upset at everything! On a day like that, I just feel like venting and letting it all out. However, I don't think my girlfriend saw it that way, so it did lead to a bit of an argument. From now on, though, I'm warning everyone in my life - If around the end of the month I start getting upset and irrational, just listen to me and nod in sympathy. I'm sure I'm not making sense or being logical in my emotions. Just give me chocolate and hugs and ride out the storm. =)

1 comment:

  1. Maybe talking with your friend as well as your girlfriend and talking about your real condition would give you some real deal. I understand your situation but even if you're not in the mood, being surrounded with the right people makes all things easier and better to handle. But then, I'm really glad with all those improvements that you are going with even though just subtle in a way they are :)